Monday, November 26, 2007
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Twilight
The skyline o'er me draws a ribbon of gleam
I see that little window across the road on the nineteenth floor
I see the dream
I see it open, I see it waiting ..wanting more
The music that I hear is not a sound
The world that I seek is not finite
Below me is zero ground
And above..breaking twilight...
I see that little window across the road on the nineteenth floor
I see the dream
I see it open, I see it waiting ..wanting more
The music that I hear is not a sound
The world that I seek is not finite
Below me is zero ground
And above..breaking twilight...
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
A Mid-Career Crisis
A phenomenon that I very recently observed as being very dominant in my life is ..well .. not exactly the midcareer crisis.
In fact the most unique thing about this state of being is that I share it with several youth of my and upbringing. One prominent thing in this is that most youngsters going through a similar mental exercise would typically belong to the above average young overachievers.
The basic problem with us is the stubbornness to demand nothing but the very best of things in life and also the unwillingness to accept the readily avaible mediocre options.
We have all historically been excellent academic genioussess, all rounders, apples of parents and teachers eyes, at the same time popular with friends and great at ideas, have had opinions at everything and anything on earth , and also always had the cheek to get heard.
Ok I am sleepy... can I do this tomorrow?
Lead on my lashes..
Heavy heart
It kills but doesent make you dead
In fact the most unique thing about this state of being is that I share it with several youth of my and upbringing. One prominent thing in this is that most youngsters going through a similar mental exercise would typically belong to the above average young overachievers.
The basic problem with us is the stubbornness to demand nothing but the very best of things in life and also the unwillingness to accept the readily avaible mediocre options.
We have all historically been excellent academic genioussess, all rounders, apples of parents and teachers eyes, at the same time popular with friends and great at ideas, have had opinions at everything and anything on earth , and also always had the cheek to get heard.
Ok I am sleepy... can I do this tomorrow?
Lead on my lashes..
Heavy heart
It kills but doesent make you dead
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Potential is unimaginable..
Its amazing how I consistently beat my own expectations of my capabilities each day.
Its just a matter of trying a bit harder –
I think what is important is the willingness to do something
Like I would not expect myself to do anything but crash on my bed after spending good 17 hours in office and having slept not more than four hours each day for the last five days – but no..I get back and get on to my laptop – for two things – my blog and my last crush.
No matter what keeps me busy each day – but come home and his thought inevitably comes with. My sheer temptation of finding out what he is upto pushes me to unimginable limits of stamina and enthu when I spend millions of hours over the net each night just to catch his trail.
It kinda funny as well. But you really can’t always reason out what drives whom.
And my blog is the inherent unaccomplished desire to become popular – of doing something more motivating than the mudane other 17 hours.
It gives me a kick to do this – write something for my blog. Gives me a feeling that I’m getting there – straw by straw – I’m building up my dream – each day, else I feel I just lost another important day without contributing to my purpose – just doing what I’m currently bound to do. Its my desire to live something that drives me to make efforts not otherwise doable for me – mentally and also physically.
My eyes are dropping - wonder if anyone shares the same passion as me.
I wish I had a similar drive for things that could impact me more materially
Its just a matter of trying a bit harder –
I think what is important is the willingness to do something
Like I would not expect myself to do anything but crash on my bed after spending good 17 hours in office and having slept not more than four hours each day for the last five days – but no..I get back and get on to my laptop – for two things – my blog and my last crush.
No matter what keeps me busy each day – but come home and his thought inevitably comes with. My sheer temptation of finding out what he is upto pushes me to unimginable limits of stamina and enthu when I spend millions of hours over the net each night just to catch his trail.
It kinda funny as well. But you really can’t always reason out what drives whom.
And my blog is the inherent unaccomplished desire to become popular – of doing something more motivating than the mudane other 17 hours.
It gives me a kick to do this – write something for my blog. Gives me a feeling that I’m getting there – straw by straw – I’m building up my dream – each day, else I feel I just lost another important day without contributing to my purpose – just doing what I’m currently bound to do. Its my desire to live something that drives me to make efforts not otherwise doable for me – mentally and also physically.
My eyes are dropping - wonder if anyone shares the same passion as me.
I wish I had a similar drive for things that could impact me more materially
Monday, September 10, 2007
Ramblings
“I have just a thing in my pocket..
But its not one.. its many”
Life is such an unpredictable combination of events. You can have one million crushes and feel like dying for each one of them each day..and you might have one long cherished dream and won’t hesitate giving it away when its right there in your hands.. for maybe, as little as a day of peace or a glass of water.. or wine maybe.
Music is a great company..it makes you feel crowded in solitude and keeps you private in a crowded place.
It sometimes even helps overcome heat.
As I pour these assorted ramblings, I would confess that a confused mind is akin to a raffle hamper – full of surprises, excitement and lacking any sequence or order…and sometimes reason (for e.g. there is no reason why a sachet of shampoo should be found with a pack of wafers in the hamper. The interesting thing here is that none of these, although random, are redundant. The sachet fulfills its utility of avoiding the embarrassment of borrowing hair wash on a sleepy Monday morning when you suddenly realize shivering under your perpetually leaking cloggy shower that banging your ancient bottle against your palm wont produce anymore heavenly drops of unworldly cleansing agents. Moreover the whole pain of peeping naked through half open doors to call for aid and then having to raise your voice to deafening pitches to ensure that someone heard your call can all be saved …. Thanks to the sachet in your hamper.
And for the pack of wafers..well, tha’ll be the first thing you pick up from the pack and whoof !...that adipose on you just grew richer!!
White and yellow are corporate colours.
The above is crap.
Actually investment bankers feel that yellow ties are cool and poker is professional. They love the word – “professional” I mean. Someone once joked that taking small sips of cold water and wearing yellow ties with light coloured shirts and talking less than frowning is professional..maybe it is.
I banking is many more things as well. Its about about craking big deals and negotiating and getting done with. About fat bonuses and research reports and about outsourcing.
I have a kaleidoscope in my pocket . if you put in one chip..i’ll show you twelve..if you put one thought ..i’ll have twenty.
MATH IS INEVITABLE.
And it goes on the resume.
But its not one.. its many”
Life is such an unpredictable combination of events. You can have one million crushes and feel like dying for each one of them each day..and you might have one long cherished dream and won’t hesitate giving it away when its right there in your hands.. for maybe, as little as a day of peace or a glass of water.. or wine maybe.
Music is a great company..it makes you feel crowded in solitude and keeps you private in a crowded place.
It sometimes even helps overcome heat.
As I pour these assorted ramblings, I would confess that a confused mind is akin to a raffle hamper – full of surprises, excitement and lacking any sequence or order…and sometimes reason (for e.g. there is no reason why a sachet of shampoo should be found with a pack of wafers in the hamper. The interesting thing here is that none of these, although random, are redundant. The sachet fulfills its utility of avoiding the embarrassment of borrowing hair wash on a sleepy Monday morning when you suddenly realize shivering under your perpetually leaking cloggy shower that banging your ancient bottle against your palm wont produce anymore heavenly drops of unworldly cleansing agents. Moreover the whole pain of peeping naked through half open doors to call for aid and then having to raise your voice to deafening pitches to ensure that someone heard your call can all be saved …. Thanks to the sachet in your hamper.
And for the pack of wafers..well, tha’ll be the first thing you pick up from the pack and whoof !...that adipose on you just grew richer!!
White and yellow are corporate colours.
The above is crap.
Actually investment bankers feel that yellow ties are cool and poker is professional. They love the word – “professional” I mean. Someone once joked that taking small sips of cold water and wearing yellow ties with light coloured shirts and talking less than frowning is professional..maybe it is.
I banking is many more things as well. Its about about craking big deals and negotiating and getting done with. About fat bonuses and research reports and about outsourcing.
I have a kaleidoscope in my pocket . if you put in one chip..i’ll show you twelve..if you put one thought ..i’ll have twenty.
MATH IS INEVITABLE.
And it goes on the resume.
Sunday, September 9, 2007
I cant give up
If I’m trying to convince myself for being happy, am I being a saint?
I am a very lonely person by virtue of my nature and also by virtue of this I am mostly very unfortunate.
Taking this in an extremely pragmatic manner leads me to believe that every second person on this planet might feel the same way. However, my human heart further questions the heavens for not including me in the other half.
Having seen 23 years of inequality, injustice and irrationality, I am now used to taking in the customary blows with ease and getting back on track pretty quickly.
Nothing in life is fair. But probably that’s where the fun is – more like a gamble – pure gamble no rationality.
A Game Of Chance.
Though I have lost quite a few lately and historically as well, something very adamant inside me pulls together my very battered morale and keeps humming a tune it calls hope.
Maybe I would never win, but as long as there’s hope – I can pretty much manage it.
J
PS: My stars say Im very stubborn. And I believe its true.
I am a very lonely person by virtue of my nature and also by virtue of this I am mostly very unfortunate.
Taking this in an extremely pragmatic manner leads me to believe that every second person on this planet might feel the same way. However, my human heart further questions the heavens for not including me in the other half.
Having seen 23 years of inequality, injustice and irrationality, I am now used to taking in the customary blows with ease and getting back on track pretty quickly.
Nothing in life is fair. But probably that’s where the fun is – more like a gamble – pure gamble no rationality.
A Game Of Chance.
Though I have lost quite a few lately and historically as well, something very adamant inside me pulls together my very battered morale and keeps humming a tune it calls hope.
Maybe I would never win, but as long as there’s hope – I can pretty much manage it.
J
PS: My stars say Im very stubborn. And I believe its true.
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