Thursday, June 20, 2013

Queue-ki naaki

Not so long ago I was shipped to Dubai. And I have lugged this blog along in my large brown bag. And here I open it first thing at the Carrefour super duper hyper store. Thanks to the forever due FDI in retail we havn’t yet discovered the Ikea meatballs (or was it horse-meatballs?) and the serpentine queues in India.  Or for the latter, have we?

 At the Mumbai local ticket counters, at the immigration department at airports, at the passport office, at the college admission counters, at the ATM, at the bus stop, at the water tap and also at Mcdonalds? Delhi ofcourse, is not included in this. There, you just mob around for everything, call out names,  and rape someone if you can.

 Anyway, back to queues (did you know it is spelt like this?), if you have ever been to one, chances are you agree that they are highly frustrating!

These forever 21 queues (21 is the number of people ahead of you) make me hate mankind (and womankind) and hope I was in a country, where they sell guns with 21 bullets in supermarkets, so I could shoot the queue ahead of me and suffocate the billing executive under the 21 corpses.

 Even in a store with 21 queues, it always seems that you are stuck in the slowest one. Its either the slow billing executive who can’t count money right, or doesn’t have keys to the teller, or it could be one of those annoying customers ahead of you who want to change their mind about items just after they are scanned, or those who want to reach out to pick chewing gum 7 feet away from the counter after all their items have been scanned, or better still, there are stealers who stuff a bag inside a bigger bag, thinking it won’t be noticed and they could have it for free. Whatever the reason, the ice-cream in your cart will sure melt before you reach the billing counter.

 Worse is when you are standing at the express counter and a hot looking girl walks to the guy at 7 and points to her buns. This guy is the typical “chomu” who is too happy that a girl spoke to him and she let him stare at her buns. Even though they were edible ones. Apparently she had only one item to scan to she can jump the queue. And the chomu lets her. And how many items did he have? A pair of slippers. While, I at number 21, can fume and do nothing else.

 Take my suggestion, if you want to remain sane, don’t ever go to a supermarket on a weekend if you have less than 20 items to buy. Its not worth the heart-ache or the back.

 PS: Have you heard that song "Isshq ki naaki"...?What is "naaki" anyway?

2 comments:

Debarshi said...

Hi sana,

I was into FB after a long time , and just had a glimpse of anda curreau . I thought it could be an interesting piece .

Allow me to criticize you.pl

Though the topic was good and the as usual your examples and ability to bring the synergy is still good, i would appreciate had there been little less of () and explanations at every second word was bit annoying .... Hope to see some more interesting stuff coming soon .

reader (and criticizer)
Debarshi Bhattacharya

The Head Over Heels said...

Hey Debu, thanks for passing by my blog and leaving your feedback. The brackets were intended not to include explainations but to make it funnier. But I get your point. Keep checking for future posts and fewer brackets :)