Bean There.. Done that.

Being 27 means: Hiding ur DOB on fb, not telling people at work, insisting on lighting a single candle to save the ozone layer, avoiding birthday bumps on ur broken back, gulping down 5 cups of coffee to keep urself awake, snuggling in ur bed after work and thinking.. gosh.. am I the oldest living single female?!

Looking at yourself in the mirror and trying hard to count all the fine lines, realizing that after orkut.com, facebok.com, twitter.com.. its time for shaadi.com.

Watching Turning 30 and feeling young again. Feeling tingly that now you can date the George Clooney's of the World.

Turning back at all those years, and somewhere feeling like an adult. Knowing that no one really knows where they are headed. And its ok to be that way. Not running after answers, not trying to fit in, not even into ur old jeans.

27 is about being a woman. Yes, your very own Aunty. And thats Cool :)

Confessions

Furtive glances at you
From the mirror in front of me
You look delicious
You is all I can see
I can be a good girl another day
Just for this moment, let me have my way.

{{Dedicated to pastries, chocolates, and men}}

Working Hard-LEE !!

We once played this game.. each sentence ending with LEE.. Bruce Lee, Sara Lee, Onlee, Junglee, hardlee.. and on and on. however, as usal.. that is not the subject of this post. . just a teaser (remember "the erection"?)..

Interestingly, the main subject is even more interesting. Its about how hard we work at work. So my question to you.. how many of you think that you are working too hard or your company is taking too much off you??

I see many hands.. and the truth remains .. that yes they are the blood suckers who want to take away the last drop of life we have at our disposal. All companies should make 5 days off and two days working... (from home).

I just did some basic calculation to see exactly how hard we work. And I am sharing the results with you. The calculations are based on the Hard-Lee Working Calculation Model (with due respect and credits to the founder.. which is me ;P)



Interestingly, even if you dont consider the efficiency losses, we only work for 61% (or 75% for the unfortunate souls) of the days we are actually paid for. And if you legitimately adjust for the efficiency losses.. {which i have assumed a very honest figure of approx 1.5 hours per day for people not working on saturdays (that makes approx 1 day loss per week).. and since I am well aware how much peopple work on sacond half of saturday.. I have plus 0.5 loss for them)...we are working for only 46% of the days we are actually paid for!!!

Those that work in PSUs would be happier... since they have a much larger pool of PLs..

Hence my hard working friends, no matter how hard they try to demotivate us... we will still be working hard-Lee!! ;P !

Three questions on three things

Chats
Do three question marks together make it a bigger question?
Is hmm different from hmmm?
Don’t three dots suffice... ?

Chicks
Is hot always dumb?
What is the opposite of hot?
Is sexy always good at sex?


Chutkulas
Why are all jokes poor jokes?
Can there be a good poor joke?
Would good jokes be funny?

Zuk Goes to Work

#1
Boss: Is it done?
Zuk: It not Done.. its Dun-can..Ducan James. He is a boyband Blue’s member and recently admitted being bisexual. But why are you asking about him in the middle of work?

#2
Boss: I don’t remember my desk number... I have weak memory {winks}
Zuk: That’s fine sir... Even I don’t remember mine... coz I don’t have one!! {rolls}

(The fact that Zuk finds it funny while his boss doesn’t makes it all the more funny)

#3
Boss: You have been working on this for a while... what is your deadline?
Zuk: This. {Makes a horizontal line in air with his thumb, right below his chin}

#4
Boss: We have been looking at sources of interest free credit.
Zuk: Ah... once upon a time... free press used to give credit for your good actions without any material interest. Now even they are interested in TRPs!!

#5
Client on phone: I am visiting from Delhi. Can you give me directions to reach your office?
Zuk on phone: Sure. First of all… take a taxi and go to the Delhi domestic airport {silent giggle}

Dimension Z

Abstract, absent yet absolute..

Defined limitless boundaries

A point in time beyond eternity

Reaching out

Folding in.. contained within

In my head

Dimension Z.

I.m.a.g.i.n.a.t.i.o.n.

This one is on fantasizing.

Stop imagining right there.

I know I am choosing a very boundless topic and by virtue of which I might have already invoked certain naughty expectations in my readers. And going by the trend these days, the creative ones would have already imagined the details I could go into - that much for the pleasure of imagining.

However, I am going to be very seedha and shareef and only talk about stuff you don’t need to censor by Bollywood standards (well.. that too before the times of Imraan Hashmi), where the limit is two chrysanthemums locking heads!

So anyway.. i’ll first bore you with the story of how I thought of this topic. I’ll be brief. See this video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mV39ozcAUzM

Ok you are in love. Ok you can’t get him/her. But beyond that?

I wonder if anyone actually imagines stuff like that. Or maybe, we do (and don’t tell). Afterall, the beauty of fantasy is in the freedom to fanaticize...

So go ahead.. take a moment off and smile at that thought that once crossed your mind and you never shared it with anyone :).

Naughty!!